Ja-lene Clark:
The Homeless Man Who Cured Indifference

In October of 2006, I met an author I had been working with in New York City. We planned to attend a class with a very special spiritual teacher. Financially, funds were limited for both of us so we needed frugal accommodations and would split the cost of a room. Rebecca and I found a deal online for a room on the edge of Soho close to the event for only $100 a night. A bargain, huh? That was a rate that we could afford!

We flew to New York, me from Tulsa and her from Santa Fe, and met at the airport so we could save more money by sharing a cab to our hotel. It was late in the evening when we checked in at our bargain hotel. After we got our keys, we were informed that the hotel had no elevator so we had to schlep our luggage up three flights. Our room was modest, clean, with the smallest bathroom I have ever seen. But the room had an even more funky twist… it was an interior room with no windows! That was especially creepy. Rebecca called it our tomb rather than room. We could deal with it though, we agreed; it wasn’t about the room —we were out for an adventure in the city!

The next morning Rebecca and I walked to the workshop. In the daylight we realized just how close to the edge of the Bowery, or the edge of danger, we were. The map online made it look like we were in a safe place, but here, in the daylight, all we could see was a dirty street lined with filthy people in misery. This was not a safe place for two non-citified women to be.  We deliberately made no eye contact. Not looking was a challenge, but it was even harder not to judge the street people. I knew they all had a story, a reason a why they had ended up there, but I certainly would not engage a single one of them in chit-chat or conversation to discover why.

We were relieved to arrive safely at the event and checked in early. I had spotted a Starbucks across the street from the workshop and talked Rebecca into going there with me. I didn’t feel safe going alone. I was happy that I could also indulge in having a comfortable place to enjoy a smoke with my strong coffee. (Click here to read about when I quit smoking.)

It was a sunny autumn Saturday morning in the big city! We sat outside and Rebecca tolerated my smoking by sitting downwind. The courtyard at Starbucks was full. The atmosphere was light. You could hear the hum from the city along with people engaged in conversations in the courtyard. Lovely!

Suddenly the collective mood darkened when one particular man entered the courtyard. He looked disheveled in his army jacket and dirty pants. A little white poodle was so alarmed by this man’s presence that he barked non-stop while pulling on the leash held by an obviously startled woman. The disheveled man pulled a silver flask out of his coat pocket and took a big swig. Wow, I thought…it wasn’t even 10 am yet. He screamed at the woman with the dog. “What are YOU looking at?” The woman cowered and turned her eyes away from him. He went from table to table yelling and harassing people.  Everyone was frozen with fear. No one spoke to him. I wondered if someone from Starbucks would come to rescue us or if a policeman would hear the ruckus and save us from this obviously dangerous man.

I looked at Rebecca and somehow felt safer if we just kept looking directly at each other. Maybe he would go away and not approach our table. I could see him coming up behind Rebecca and I quickly turned my eyes down and away. No eye contact seemed like a good plan to me!  It had kept us safe in the Bowery…but next thing I knew I was staring down at a pair of filthy combat boots. What was I going to do? What was he going to do? He was standing right in front of me, much too close for my comfort and he wasn’t moving away. I had to do something. I raised my eyes to meet his. He was towering over me and I felt very fragile. I smiled genuinely and said, “How are you doing today?” He took a step back, smiled, laughed and pointed toward our table, “I’d be doing better if you gave me one of them Marlboros.” “Sure!” I said, then gave him a cigarette and lit it for him. It was a miraculous and surreal moment because in a flash I watched as he went from angry to laughing. He took a puff from the cigarette and looked down at me again and said, “You are beautiful!” He walked backward away from me, still facing me, continuing to meet my eyes. I was smiling by this time while the people in the crowded courtyard were silent, stunned and watching. Even the barking poodle was quiet.

Just before he passed the fence, he turned back to me again and screaming as he faded from view, “You are beautiful, honey! You ought to be in H O L L Y W O O D!”

After he was gone, once Rebecca got her breath back, she said, “What the *##@ was that?”

I laughed, sighed relief and nervously lit another cigarette….

It wasn’t until that evening that the absolute power of that experience hit me. I thought about it…What did that man want? What did he expect to gain by scaring or intimidating the people in that courtyard? One could easily think it was attention or that is just how he entertained himself. I don’t think so. I think he was hungry. Not for food though. Maybe he was hungry for someone to acknowledge his presence as a human being and look him in the eyes. What did I get from the experience? I got to be part of something extraordinary. I received the cure for indifference from a crazy, scary homeless man in combat boots. And when I look back at that event today, I can clearly acknowledge that the homeless man was my teacher.

Be not forgetful to entertain strangers: for thereby some have entertained angels unawares. ~ Hebrews 13:2

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